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THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN

 
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PhizUniq



Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 5770
Location: HAITI

 PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 11:33 am    Post subject: THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN Reply with quote Back to top

Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie. She accepts. They have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while, neither one of them is seeing anybody else.

Then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine,
and, without really thinking, she says it aloud, "Do you realize that, as of
tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?" And then
there is silence in the car... To Elaine, it seems like a very loud
silence. She thinks to herself: "I wonder if it bothers him that I said that.
Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship. Maybe he thinks I'm
trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or
isn't sure of."

And Roger is thinking, "Gosh. Six months!"

And Elaine is thinking, "But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of
relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd
have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are. I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?"

And Roger is thinking, "So that means it was... Let's see... February when
we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's,
which means, let me check the odometer. Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here."

And Elaine is thinking, "He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm
reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment. Maybe he has sensed-even before I sensed it that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected."

And Roger is thinking, "And I'm going to have them look at the ransmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600."

And Elaine is thinking, "He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry,
too. I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I
feel. I'm just not sure."

And Roger is thinking, "They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty.
Scumbags!"

And Elaine is thinking, "Maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight
to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a
perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, school girl romantic fantasy."

And Roger is thinking, "Warranty? Where is my warranty?"

"Roger," Elaine says aloud.
"What?" says Roger, startled.
"Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to
brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have... Oh , I feel so..." (She
breaks down, sobbing.)

"What?" says Roger.
"I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really
know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no white horse."

"There's no white horse?" says Roger.
"You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says.
"No!" says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.
"It's just that... it's that I... I need some time," Elaine says.
(There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries
to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.) "Yes," he says.

(Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.) "Oh, Roger, do you really feel
that way?" she says.
"What way?" says Roger.
"That way about time," says Elaine.
"Oh," says Roger. "Yes."
(Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to
become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.) "Thank you, Roger," she says.

"Thank you," says Roger.
Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured
soul, and weeps until dawn. Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it.

The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them,
and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, _expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification.

Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball the next day with a mutual
friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say,
"Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between men and women.
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SIROMYEL



Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 9967
Location: TAMPA

 PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 2:11 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Back to top

Phiz, I'm rolling on the floor laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

that's a good one.
 
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konpaconvert



Joined: 13 Mar 2006
Posts: 7440
Location: FORT LAUDERDALE

 PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 2:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Back to top

Laughing Laughing Laughing

Thats the best story I 've heardf yet......Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, and pulot, and saturn, and uranius and from planets we have never learned existed. LOL!!!
 
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Alexavice



Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 357
Location: ViceKreyol Land

 PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 3:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Back to top

LMAO! so funny and so true.











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FUNKY



Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 27830
Location: Body: Montréal..Mind: Haiti chérie

 PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2006 3:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote Back to top

Mezanmi Phizzz Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing

Sa bon net.....

Thanks for sharing Wink
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